June 14, 2021

These Holiday Movies Must Be Made

A Nice brown-haired girl must choose whether to wed Handsome Plaid Man or Man in Peacoat by Christmas, or else no dowery from dad. Which male looked much better next to trees? Most important, which man has the most sexless Christlike kiss?

Every vacation motion picture now has to do with a randy prince who travels to America and falls for a clumsy New York barista, and were ill of it.
So here are a couple of ideas for good Christmas movies that Hollywood should make instead:
When a baker is having difficulty getting his partner pregnant, the spirit of the season fills his pants and turns his penis into Santa Claus. Including the voice of Gilbert Gottfried as Santa Penis.
When a fungal infection cleans out 99% of Santas reindeer, Krandolph, the most disgusting reindeer of all, may lastly get an opportunity to prove himself.
Malcolm Madwell plots revenge on his homophobic family by showing up that Christmas for the very first time in years, to announce that he saw his father on Grindr.
A Nice brown-haired lady should choose whether to wed Handsome Plaid Man or Man in Peacoat by Christmas, or else no dowery from dad. Which male looked much better next to trees?
Santa has to rush to change his Bar Mitzvah style overnight when he discovers his buddy, Saul Kringlestein, has likewise chosen the style 90s SNL.
A heartfelt motion picture about a mixed household holiday that mostly simply winds up being Christmas, other than for one long scene where the family tries to find a great location to put a menorah, and is ultimately unsuccessful.

CREDITS
Producers:
Julie Greiner, Grace Thomas, Tamara Yajia Editor:
Julie Greiner Writers:
Julie Greiner & & Grace Thomas